You Know You Live in Southern California When…

-You drive 20 minutes and pass through five cities.

-You’ve ever been snowboarding, skateboarding, and water skiing… all in the same day.

-You can’t spell your governor’s name, but you think he’s cool because he can beat up every other governor in the country.

-You’re out-of-state on vacation and your heart flutters at the words “Double-Double.”

-You’re ashamed that “California Pizza” means pizza with bok choy, pike eel, portabella mushrooms, and asparagus.

-Your relatives from out-of-state think you see celebrities walking around everywhere

-You expect a high speed chase to interrupt your favorite TV shows at least twice a week.

-You use your whole paycheck to pay for gas.

-You’re planning a vacation and you have four airports to choose from.

-It’s January and you’re considering going to the beach.

-The winter clothes come out when it hits 65 degrees.

-You have ever said, “do you speak english?”

-You see the Police doing “California Stops”

-It sprinkles and the top news is “Storm Watch 2009″ (this was originally written in 2004 but I made it current)

-You commute 35 miles to work and it takes you 2 hours and you drive a minimum of 3 freeways.

-You wonder who’s bright idea it was to call it “rush hour”

-You’re white and think you deserve “minority rights”

-Your neighbors to the left go to Vegas for the weekend, your neighbors to the right go up to the mountains, and the guy across the street with all the tattoos… well, you don’t really want to know, you’re just glad he is gone.

(Special thanks to my parents who inspired Jay to put this in the Youth Light)